Once I was sailing along the Irtysh (or along the Lovat?)
And I met a naked Kalmyk very opportunely.
Oh, the task is not easy - to conquer the Kalmyk girl!
But I took out the master key from my shorts in time.

Where Baikal splashes (such a lake),
I entertained the Cuban with what was at hand ...
I am grateful to fate that my Cuban
She took me to her very depths!

One night on the steep bank of the Amur
The girls stared at the "Heart of Bonivur" group.
There I noticed two young Tuvinian women
And all night he stayed with them between halves.

One night on the Oka, on an empty barge
Chuvash's chest I crumpled carefully in my hand.
We sat down on the mattress, rolled up the mash ...
And the dream came true (seven times) of a young Chuvash.

One day in broad daylight in Krakow (on the Vistula)
The legs of the polka hung on my shoulders.
The stern of the long-legged polka was good!
By the morning I went crazy, pushing the slices apart.

And one day in the spring somewhere on the Danube
I met a German woman who was mentally ill.
I dug into it like a mole and bit like a horsefly...
A German woman defended her degree in about a year.

One night a barge was sailing on the waves of the Euphrates.
In it, I just accustomed the Kazakh woman to debauchery.
I aimed my device at a young Kazakh woman...
The Kazakh woman still has her legs wide open.

The Nile spread wide downstream ...
There I persuaded a Bashkir to porn entertainment.
It was the ninth wave! .. By the morning I am a Bashkir
Barely tore it off by the scruff of the neck!

Once on the river Limpopo, which is known to children,
I met a typist from our depot,
That stood in the way, leaning low...
I couldn't get past the typist!

Somewhere near a wasteland, somewhere on the Hudson,
I picked a Buryatka in the erogenous zone.
And an arrow of love entered the heart of that Buryat woman ...
The next morning she could not go out to exercise.

Once on Lake Huron (or Huron?)
I drove my cartridge into the chamber for an Uzbek.
An Uzbek woman rushed from me with all her might ...
But in vain - I could not allow misfires.

Past a quiet village along the Ohio River
The Swede swam naked, and even naked!
It's a pity, the mother of her children, that such a Swede
It can be extremely rare along the way!

Once a Japanese woman under a bush on the Izhora River
She sang "Boston Waltz" in B-flat major.
Ah, what an alluring look that Japanese woman had ...
Since then, both my eardrums have been hurting.

A huge crocodile swam down the Elbe,
Where I conducted live shooting with a Czech ...
And two days ago at the mouth of the Rio Grande
The Ethiopian kneaded her tonsils about me.

Once a Karelian came to me and brought a Karelian.
I warmed up a whole plate of borscht for her...
On the bend of the Ob somewhere closer to the night
I loved that karelka outside the box very much.

Once in Kolyma (or Ilmen?)
I fucked a Nanai and her deer.
Oh, I'll leave in the spring in the wilds of the Amazon!
Finns and Estonians longed for me there.

Chastushki for my wife's birthday. Funny funny ditties on the birthday of a woman or girl.Chastushki - jokes with a hint on the birthday of a wife from a husband or a girl from a guy.Chastushki about birthday gifts for a woman. Chastushki to my wife.

Funny ditties about a wife for a birthday or anniversary

Here is the Pythagorean problem:

How to travel half the country?

Where can I get the sea of ​​​​flowers

On your wife's birthday?

I won't go fishing

Forgive me guys!

Took the rods to the landfill

On my wife's birthday!

A whole month to live without beer!

The news breaks my soul!

wife's birthday

I ate my entire salary!

Ditties about gifts for a wife or girlfriend

What to buy for your wife as a gift?

Think, think baby!

How about skinning a tiger?

Zhinka loves cats!

On the birthday of a girl

I bought plates.

And she is a plate

I broke the crown!

Gave to my wife

On the birthday of honey in the hive.

Only she will open her mouth -

I will release the swarm!

And my darling

I bought diapers.

Something for the wife to do

Stop just kissing!

I bought my wife a herring

And she: “I want pantyhose!”

I am a simple and Russian man:

"What's the use of them? “Not a snack!”

I will give my wife a pot

Birthday in July.

You, wife, listen to me -

I really want to eat!

Oh, my wife beat me

Gift head!

She wants a fur coat

With the brightest fur!

Wife wants a car!

Just not washing!

Well, I only give her a tire

Smog for premiums!

If things go like this,

I'll give you a lock on your mouth!

Says too often

Attention! These ditties for the birthday of his wife and girlfriend are prohibited from reprinting on the Internet. If you want to talk about these cool birthday ditties to your wife from her husband, put a link to this page.

Cool Songs-Alterations to Husband for Anniversary and Birthday

1. Cap white

Capless white,
Striped collar.
Pioneers are bold
Directly asked:

What year Vova
From which ship
And on what seas
Has our sailor visited?
-

He is valiant in the morflot
3 years served
On mother ships with pride
Fished, did not grieve.

Husband is very homely
Spoil everything you want
Traveled all over Thailand
Our hockey fan!

Pioneer eternal
We wish you an anniversary
Happiness endless,
[…]*

© Mariana Shell
____________

2. Cool Song-Alteration for the anniversary of Husband from his wife and girlfriends
(to the motive of the song gr.Viagra "Diamonds")

Even the mirror is delighted with him -
Such persons
All the beauties in this world love
And the cops
Armenian in everything, and no matter how,
Can't compare to him
Nowhere, no one, nothing, no way!

In this macho a mile away, it beckons us so much
barbecue smell,
And his great Armenian intellect
Immediately noticeable
And how he laughs with a funny joke,
What will we cry
Nowhere, no one, nothing, no way.

Not bags simple money him,
And the suitcases
All Auchan and Metro he filled up
with your goods,
Yes, and with meat is not a hindrance for him
great plans
Nowhere, no one, nothing, no way.

No need to get lost in self-doubt
Our Simon is gorgeous, no options,
He is beautiful in every way, without exception,
And we value such men more than diamonds!

losing

Not even lost in self-doubts
To sing Simone here praises -
He promised everyone, without exception,
Give a valuable necklace with a bunch of diamonds
[…]*

3. Comic funny Song-Alteration to Husband from wife and children
(to the motive of the song "My grandmother smokes a pipe")

For some, the colonel is sharp,
Strict and very cool
But we will say about him without flattery -
Husband is not like that in real life.

Witty, soulful, wise
And our very kind hero of the day,
We love him very much and it's not difficult for us at all
Just call him King!

Chorus:

The rest is up to us,
And we do not need a better share -
We love our King!

Let him not be as tall as Uncle Styopa,
But it has weight in society,
And to ordinary, like us, serfs
Shows interest at times.

Well, if the husband suddenly dances
Or sing to us in karaoke -
We rejoice with such happiness,
After all, he is a singer and dancer - fly away!

Chorus:
Our birthday boy would be happy
The rest is up to us,
And we do not need a better share -
We love our King!

We wish him a new jeep
Immense as his heart,
Traveling around the homeland - we know
There is nothing sweeter on earth.

Let it be treated with female attention
He will also be up to a hundred years old,
After all, with such charisma and charm
Not a man - but just a dream!

Chorus:
Our birthday boy would be happy
The rest is up to us,
And we do not need a better share -
We love our King!

4. Song-Alteration to Husband - a cool gift from his wife for an anniversary
(to the motive of the song "Blood Type")

Peter was born in autumn
His lot was great -
Like an officer
served well,
[…]*
And "on a horse" he rode off to Moscow.

There RosAtom
anxiously waiting,
entourage rich
I met Petya
The secretary is now serving him co-o-fe.

And with prosperity, everything is in the mind,
He lacks only a yacht,
To fish in a big way
And in vain do not loom!
-

Let the fish swim towards him in a shoal,
So that his hobby could
To feed everyone, not just to please the cat.

Let everything be a bundle in your career,
We will rub our noses to the West,
And our Peter tramples later
I'm on my way there.

So that RosAtom
Stations of their
Built a dozen
the coolest
And to surpass him Bill Ge-e-yets,
[…]*

© Mariana Shell
____________

5. Soulful Reworked Song to Husband on his birthday from wife and friends
(to the motive "The bend of the yellow guitar")

We have a great reason to gather here today
In the company of a cheerful all together at the table -
Congratulate the birthday boy, sing and laugh,
Take on the chest for Yurich and remember the past.

The fate of her husband's life threw a lot,
But from a mining family, he is not weak in spirit,
For the air of Sakhalin we will raise our glasses,
What gives character and strength and scale.

Passed the sea distances and built a house in Bryansk,
And our Yurich planted a whole garden of trees,
With the care of a son and daughter, he raised beautiful,
And for friends, the last shirt is glad to give.

Let's remember a lot of good things about her husband
[…]*

6. Beautiful Song-Alteration to Husband - an anniversary gift from his wife
(to the tune of Shufutinsky's song "September 3rd")

Every day is a bustle
We're in a hurry,
On business, on your job,

bring, take,
What to eat and almost
We are no longer recognized
But it comes again

That September day, the most important,
The day when forgetting about all things,
We will get together and Ruslana
We will congratulate you again.

We will turn the calendar
And the twenty-fifth

Whatever the weather was.

In the circle of relatives, in the circle of friends,
Vanity melts like smoke
And Crimea will unite us again
At the Little Lighthouse

And who could not from weekdays
Break out today - soul
They are thoughts with you
At the Little Lighthouse
-

Our Ruslan is busy,
And bogged down with your head
As always, all in your work

Strict temper and cool,
Such a silent
impenetrable, like a shadow,
But that day will come

That September day is long-awaited,
The day when Ruslan is open in soul,
He is homely and the sweetest -
Among us can be

How rarely do we have you with children
Sometimes we see - from problems
Global you save the world
And as if everyone needs air,

But September will come again
And the twenty-fifth
You forget about things
And you will be only ours

Losing -

We will turn the calendar
And the twenty-fifth
My husband and I will rush to the Crimea again,
Whatever the weather was.
[…]*

© Mariana Shell
____________

7. Cool Reworked Song-Congratulations to a Man
(alteration of the words of the song "Turn")

For a great man
There are always reasons to drink
But we don't care!

This glorious birthday
We are especially impatient
We are waiting - we will gladly pour

For a new turn, let it bring
In life, only takeoff

© Mariana Shell
___

* * *
see also Examples of other Congratulations on the site Poetry.Ru:

Soulful, touching and a bit comical song-alteration to Husband from his wife for his birthday (to the motive of M. Shufutinsky's song "Seryoga-Captain")

Here in full collection all friends,
And together as one family
And here's a happy birthday
It's my turn.

© Mariana Shell
___

Cool Comic congratulations on the Anniversary: ​​a poem to the beloved Husband from his wife for the anniversary

* * *
I'm lucky, I won't hide
To be the wife of an awesome macho -
Witty, funny, desirable,
And in appearance - well, just handsome!

Sincere and a little Comic congratulations in verse to your beloved Husband from his wife on his anniversary

* * *
Happy thirtieth birthday, my love!
So many words I want to say
So that this moment is unique
We could remember for a long time ...

And congratulations on birthday,
© Mariana Shell
____________

Cool Comic congratulations on the Anniversary of 60 years to the Husband - funny fairy tale in verse

Beyond the endless fields
Beyond the mountains, beyond the forests
Among the pines, they say
There is a man - just a treasure!
© Mariana Shell
____________

Touching Heartfelt Congratulations in Poems on the Anniversary to a beloved husband from his wife

I want to say a lot of warm words,
And congratulating my husband on his anniversary,
I thank fate that there is love
As strong as I have with Andrey.
[. . .]

© Mariana Shell
____________

Mental and touching congratulations in Poems Happy Anniversary to her husband for 75 years

What to wish such a person
Who himself has achieved and achieved everything,
Having lived for three quarters of a century,
Appreciating every moment of life.

There is something to be proud of - a lot has been done,
[. . .]

© Mariana Shell
____________

Sincere Congratulations-Toast on Anniversary to a Man
(touching comic poems to a beloved husband from his wife)

* * *
Great you combine all the roles -
Father of two daughters, worthy son
And 20 years already, as you gobble up
A pood of salt for two with me alone

See also:

Funny Songs-alterations for a Man for Anniversary and Birthday

touching Beautiful Congratulations Husband Happy Anniversary

Beautiful Touching Poems to Beloved Man

Cool Songs-Alterations to a Friend for Anniversary and Birthday

Cool funny Scenes-Congratulations on the Anniversary of a Man

Original Comic Scenarios of Congratulations and Scenes with humor

Chastushka is a folk work of art that is saturated with joy, laughter and fun. Chastushka is the most The best way give a person a cheerful mood for the whole day. In the catalog you will find a huge number of different ditties that will cheer up your loved ones and most beloved people, without which you cannot live a day. In the catalog you will find ditties for relatives, friends, a loved one and other people dear to the heart who treat you with trepidation and warmth. Start choosing right now, because a huge number of a wide variety of products is presented for you.

There was a time: having fun
Me until morning.
And now I'm walking around a bit
The husband shouts: "It's time to go home!"

Unreliable girls
Filled the country.
In our time to rely
Only for the wife!

I, sinning with a Georgian,
Deceived coolly hard
It turned out that big
He only has a cap.

The doctor gave me a pill
And said, "Run to your wife"
But from his pill
I only managed to visit a neighbor.

Don't scold me for being cute
mother mother,
I'll just take a walk in the summer
In winter there will be a son-in-law.

I have a passionate lover
Didn't get caught by the guys.
At a glance - a clear falcon,
And in fact - a sparrow.

She stood naked in front of the sweetheart:
"Whatever you want, get it!"
Darling drank Coca-Cola
Shawal "Snickers" - and goodbye.

You don't know what you're losing
You don't marry me.
I'll cry for one day
You will be lost forever.

My darling changed me
And I suffered:
It was forty kilos
Fifty left!

Like mother-in-law has pancakes
All with a ruddy crust.
My dear wants
Coat with a chic mink.

After the wedding, our Emelya
A sad whole year goes by:
He still has a wife
Protects a girl's honor.

How scattered my dear!
He took off his clothes, went to bed
And asked for details
Explain what's next.

Oh my dear, my good
Wait to marry me:
My dad is now formidable -
Postpone until Saturday.

In our life a pleasant background
Phone sex enters.
How to make it so that the bucks
Do you pay for it by fax?

Soon I'll be the owner
At the sweetheart's house.
They will sit down to supper
By my order.

Who does not sing at the wedding
Only modesty seems
He will sleep in trousers
Near the girls will lie down.

Darling at night reproached:
Like, I'm a log in bed.
Know it's time to change the saw
Until all is lost.

I drank a lot with my dear
White-red wine -
And she couldn't resist
Like the Berlin Wall!

Loved the diver
There is only one torment with him:
Invites you to a date
To the shore, then to the bottom.

Our Vanek was sitting under a maple
Not with me, but with the punks.
Thought it was still green.
Turned out to be blue.

The apartment walks like a walker,
Like a poplar storm.
Oh and they fit great.
Our biofields with her!

Don't marry girls
Dear darlings,
Don't share your braids
For two halves.

Tired of the girls will,
Good married share
I will help my husband
Buy perfume and dresses.

The son came to me: "I'm getting married!"
I sat down and sit.
Tomorrow is a first-grader daughter
He will say: "I'm getting married!"

The weather was good
Sun, grass. Silence!
If I hadn't been afraid of childbirth,
I would go to the forest with you.

Facts, girls, cry out:
With the "new Russian" - deaf!
Fingers stand up like a fan -
That's all porn!

All cuties are cuties
And mine is a fashion model:
If the key is left at home,
That will crawl through the gap under the door.

As in our planting
Everything flies white fluff.
Which guy doesn't kiss
That is not a guy, but a burdock!

He whispered sweetly to her in the cinema:
"There is no better place than you in the world!"
The light was lit, and this is a grandmother
Ninety-eight years.

Couldn't contain the pain.
Tears dripped onto the floor.
Darling got circumcised
The decimeter was cut off.

There is a bottle on the table
And in the bottle - a lily.
Soon the darling will translate
To your last name.

They say I'm pretty
Only in Sochi they don’t call
I have a short cruise
From the cowshed to the pond.

Tonight my dear
Made an offer.
I decided that I would
Him on first reading.

Cute strumming guitar
Until midnight:
Waiting in humanitarian anguish
Sexual help.

Don't get married girls
Only boredom and sadness.
Small children will start -
Just oh and swing.

You and I got married.
You, look, do not overlook!
So that they do not steal at night,
Put me under you!

By the fence in a dark place
Once deprived the grandmother of honor.
Every evening at the fence
Grandma is now waiting for a repeat.

The stars are burning in the sky.
We'll go to the bench.
I'm a cute deputy
Love will be corrected.

I yesterday my home
Terribly shocked:
For a year they gave me a salary,
But with condoms.

Rarely feed your husband with fat,
And then he will remember about the neighbor.
The neighbor has no fat,
But she is twenty years old.

Father, marry me
The girl on the far side.
To not be skinny
Salted to love.

I came to my wife from work,
Look: at the door - someone's bots.
Size - approximately forty-seven.
Maybe I should just leave?